Welcome to the Ratners of the clothing world.
We offer CRAP clothing at unbeatable prices.
Do you like wearing 'labels' but hate how common and cheap they're becoming. Worry not, our prices rise by 42% above inflation each week. There's nothing cheap about our clothes.*
Why, you can buy a pair of trousers for as little as nine-ninety nine (£999.00) or one of our new tops for only a monkey (including price of shipping, housing and feeding - £1206.52 per month).
So contact us now for our latest catalogue.
On 018001 - I-LIKE-CRAP
Or write to:
124 Squits Lane
Or, why not buy something overpriced and stupid-looking for your children from our CRAPkids range.
All kids love CRAP.
And, coming soon, our new more fluid range of clothing for babies available in green, light brown, yellow and orange.
(*except for the materials, stitching, packaging and marketing. Oh, and the customers. They're very cheap.)
REACH PALMER ON PROZAC, SOMERS ON SERTRALINE BY CLICKING HERE