SISTERS IN GOD!
THE REVEREND RICHARD
(THE CHOIRBOYS' FRIEND)
A PERSONAL MESSAGE FROM REVEREND TALLYWHACKER HIMSELF:
Hall - el - u - jah!
We're gonna heal, Brethren. We're gonna put that old trickster Lucifer in his place. We're gonna cut down his Bandwidth, delete his Web Space and crash his Modem.
|Brothers and Sisters,
I'm sure that if Our Lord were alive today, he'd take no
pleasure in kicking Satan's red shiny butt. However, the
Lord is no wuss, and if a butt-kicking is needed, then a
butt-kicking will be forthcoming.
The Lord taught us to always love our neighbours. But, if our neighbours happen to be pinko, commie subversives who are stinking up the place and creating corruption all over God's green earth, then we owe it to Jesus to kick ass.
That's why I have no hesitation in recommending Kalashnikovs For Christ.com. They're a highly reputable organisation, affiliated to Reverend Tallywhacker PLC, and have kindly agreed to waive the purchase tax on several of their catalogue lines.
Take a look at their homepage, and then prepare to do battle with the miscreants and perverts who would try to foul up apple pie like mama used to make and the land that God gave us.
Also, my main man, Biff Heckmondwyer, has a short plea to you in our continual fight against all things evil, corrupt and commie in the world. I don't wish to taint your hearts and minds with evil thoughts, but if we don't all give generously then Lucifer will surely gain a foothold even in the righteous and the end of the world is but a card swipe away!! Please give. Give until it hurts. GIVE until the pain is so intense you fall on your knees and thank the Lord for the opportunity to save your pitiful souls. GIVE until you can't give anymore. Then we'll find someone else who can.
Hall - el - u - jah! Brothers and Sisters. We're gonna deal. CLICK HERE to try and save yourselves.
I'll leave you with my thought for the week on the Next Page: a poignant little incantation which I hope you'll take to your heart and ponder upon in those moments when life feels a little low.
Remember, The Lord is always with you, and wherever you go, there you are.
Rev. Dick Tallywhacker.
MATh; BD; BA (Theol); BASW; KKK; CDM.
CLICK HERE to enter Reverend Tallywhacker's thought for the week.
CLICK HERE if you'd like to help Dick Tallywhacker's right-hand man, Biff Heckmondwyer, to kick Satan's ass!
THE REVEREND RICHARD TALLYWHACKER IS A FREELANCE PASTOR IN THE CHURCH OF OUR LADY OF THE POISONED CHALICE. HE IS AVAILABLE FOR CHRISTENINGS, WEDDINGS, FUNERALS AND THE OCCASIONAL EXORCISM.
HE TAKES ALL MAJOR CREDIT AND DEBIT CARDS
CONTACT HIS AGENTS, PALMER and SOMERS, FOR DETAILS.
REACH PALMER ON PROZAC, SOMERS ON SERTRALINE BY CLICKING HERE